He was an apparition

of my past vulnerabilities,

so intimately aware of the things I craved

that he could conjure up my fantasy

without any danger

of ever satisfying my longing.


He fit perfectly into my broken places,

not because he was my missing piece

but because he was my hammer.

The one who had destroyed my heart

and then returned to play in the rubble.


If I don’t stop this


right now,

this instant,

there will be nothing left

of me




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